We came from the called New Mass. What is New Mass? During the Second Vatican Concil that started in 1962 they changed the Holy Mass, that was until then, very traditional, said in Latin(the sacred language of the Church), and very reverent towards our Lord, and they created a new mass according to the modern world, to please the people of God more than please Our Lord himself. The Second Vatican Concil not only change the rite of the Mass, but also the Catholic sacraments and prayers, it was a new way of thinking.
I believe I was baptized right, still using the old rite, and my husband was baptized before the Vatican II, so our baptim rites were OK. But we were raised in the New Mass. We got married in 1996 at new rite Mass, and we baptized our beloved daughter in 98 also at New Mass. Back then we didn`t know anything about the history and Tradition of the church. We just went to church because everybody was going and we were the steps of our parents. I never heard about Latin Mass back then, if so I definitely would get married at old rite and get all the sacraments at old rite. But nobody told us one thing. And when we were at new rite mass, we were still under this culture, I wore jeans, pants, shorts, immodest clothing, make ups, I believed in birth control pills and many other sins, I was under a lot of vanity and so on.
My personal conversion started in January 2007 when by grace and mercy of God I had a deep conversion and great contriction of heart, and went to confession, something i have not done in more than 10 years. I had so great repetence, and such a joy for God have forgiven me that I offered myself to God, I felt the real presence of God with me for about one month, it was very beautiful,I felt a warmth feeling inside my heart, it feel so good, and I was like walking on clouds for one month.
So I offered myself to God for sins of others. And in exact 3 days I had a red bump in my left breast. I was scared. I went to doctor, she saw the red and hard bump, and I had a mamography. I was afraid it would be a breast cancer, i was afraid to die and live my small daughter orphan of mother, and I forgot the promise I made to God to do reparation in my sufferings for others. I felt like a coward to ask for a healing. So I made a promise vow to Our Lord and also for Padre Pio whose I was devoted, that if the result of my mamography was normal, no breast cancer, so I will go to Mass every day for one month, and I wanted to add more sacrifices, and i heard that interior voice asking me to cover my head for one month also. I was very astonished and very reluctant! I never wore veil at the mass, so ever! I`d be very ashmed, embarrassed to use a veil at my local church, nobody does, absolutely nobody! I never saw any lady, old or young covering head at the church before! But I was so intriged by this interior voice asking me to cover it..it was like a test of faith. I did not respond to that request right away, I was very reluctant, I needed one day to think about it. And the more I felt reluctant the more I had that urge to obey that interior voice! So finally on next day I said "yes", I agreed to wear veil for one month, if I get healed. Not only at the church, but at home, outside, at my workplace, everywhere.
So by a miracle of God soon after I made this promise the red and hard bump on my breast disappeared!! And I received the result the result of my mamograph, it was normal! Thanks to God! God is so good, so merciful, He heard my prayers! I was very grateful. So now I had to pay for the favors. I made myself a veil covering, it was small and simple. And I started to wear every day everywhere, and I started to come to daily mass at my local parish. I got a lot of stares for be the only lady wearing veil at the church, it was new mass rite, and at new rite the ladies don`t cover their heads.And when I started to come to daily mass the people wanted to know me better. And I easily made some friends.
When I had paid for all the favor granted in one month of daily mass and covering my head for one month, I felt the urge to continue to come to daily mass and specially I felt the urge to wear the veil for the Mass. One time I was on the way to the mass, I did not want to wear the veil, and I had that interior voice again to urge me to wear the veil, so Ihad to come back home to pick my veil.
My local parish was the only parish that I knew. It was new and very modern mass. And it was not very catholic, and i thought all the catholic churches here in America were the same, no devotion to Our Lady, very modern looking churches, no statues inside the church, joyful mass, more as a community than a real church, very enganging volunteer work, so everything looked "normal" to me. All I wanted is to be close to God, so i wanted to volunteer at that parish. And I started to volunteer at the sacristy that summer 2007. My sacristy work consisted in open the doors of the church early morning for the daily mass people, light the candles, prepare the bread(the hosts)and wine for the mass, prepare the altar(the table), and wait for the priest come inside the sacristy at around 8:30 the time when the mass starts, so i brought the Bible and the liturgical book inside the church, put them on the altar,and the priest comes soon after me, so i stayed for the mass..and after the mass, i cleaned up everything and put things back. This volunteer work was once a month, i was in charge of daily mass for one week, then next week will be another lady. I did this for about 5 years.
And i was determined to bring my family closer to God too. I persuated my husband to have confirmation class that year, to prepare himself for confirmation next year 2008, it was hard to convince him, he was making a lot of excuses, but with help of God he finally started to have confirmation class. The bad thing was that his confirmation class was made with a very liberal priest who refused to use the book Catechism of the Catholic Church, he wanted to teach by his own views, it was one of red flags of that parish, i should cancel his class, to have at another parish, a good and traditional catholic parish, but we were already into that parish..it sounded impossible to move out! So he had his confirmation next Lent 2008, he was not anointed by any bishop, but by this liberal priest. I was disappointed. I tried my best to put my family close to God, so by the end of 2007 i signed up my daughter to be altar girl, at that same parish, she was altar girl for one year. Can you imagine that? my own daughter as altar girl! I can not believe i did that, but back then we did not know one thing about Latin Mass and the old and Holy Tradition, i did not altar servers are supposed to be boys only, i was very devoted but was into new mass teology! All i wanted at the time was to serve God and be closer to God, but those were my own choices. I did not know God so well back them. I was converted somehow, i was wearing veil already, i was going step by step, little by little, leading by God into tradition, it was a very slow process,doing my mistakes and trying to learn more about the Church and God was very patient with me. My daughter wanted to quit her altar service work, she said she never liked, so i signed her up at children choir, for the children Mass, same parish but different location. That parish consisted in two churches, and that new church does not look like a Catholic church, it has no statues inside the church, no kneelers, nobody can kneel at the mass not even at the Consecration, no Stations of the Cross inside or out, the altar(the altar)was at the center of the church, it looks like a stage, the center of attention is the choir and the tabernacle is not there, they hid the tabernacule away from the church, at different room.
In 2007 i came into the church, worked to the church, and i got to know many priests, some good, some liberal, and i met a nice priest, who became friend of us, i won`t say this name here. So he stayed at our local parish for just 2 years, i was very sad when he left, because i liked him, he was very funny and kind to everyone, everybody loved him, except the pastor. So when he left our local parish late 2008, me and my friend went to his mass at different town, we made a deal to go there every day, or almost every day..and i started to work for him at the mass, giving communion at the mass. Yes, it`s true, I a traditionalist now had this past, my daughter was altar girl, i gave communion, i was a sacristian!
Let me tell you one thing about ladies giving Communion, it is not good, no laypeople can give holy communion, we dont have authority from God to do that, specially women, it is forbitten by God. But i did not know that. I was still under vanity...vanity to receive praises of others at the Mass, and pride! Many catholic women want to give holy communion at the mass out of vanity and pride, some do to be equals with men, but most go for vanity, to receive attention of others. There is always something behind that. I gave communion for about one year or less, maybe 7 or 8 months. Thanks to God i stopped to do it, not because my eyes were opened for this truth or because i listened to God, but for different reasons, God did create the moment, the perfect moment for my own benefit, to stop me to give communion. Praise to Thee Lord Jesus Christ.
Between 2007 and 2008 I started to learn more about the Catholic church when i searched online, first when I tried to buy a new mantilla to me, I saw very traditional catholic website..and one thing lead me to another, to the Truth. It was in 2008 when the first time I heard about the Latin Mass. And I compared with the mass I used to go at my local parish, how much different it is!! Not only the Mass is different, but the teachings are different! And the priests too, the priests at Latin Mass are so much Catholic, they dont change one thing, their teachings are always the same, from centuries and centuries, and what amazed me is that all the saints have been at Latin Mass, that was the only Mass it existed. The New Mass was created in the 60s, and the saints have died before that. St. Padre Pio died in 68, but he refused to say the new mass. How different the priests at old rite, the Latin Mass are from my local parish..and i found out that that problem is not only at my local parish, but all other parishes of the new mass, even with my friend priest. I had to leave his mass, i just could take anymore, his masses are too joyful to be the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, the mass is supposed to be the calvary. He`s a good friend, nice priest, very devoted to Our Lady, he is pro life and pro traditional marriage, but his sermons don`t talk on those issues, and he does not like the old rite, so i had to leave him behind.
The more i learned about the Latin Mass the more I believed it, and the more i feel like a Catholic. I tried to find Latin Mass close to our home and there was none, not even at towns close by.
God was leading me at right path! I can feel it! I had that secret dream that i was keeping for myself, that we need to go to Latin Mass! But I thought in my mind that it would be close to impossible, for two big reasons: our daughter was at children choir and she loved it!!And second, I knew my husband would say no, because we don`t have latin mass, so the time passed, and passed. And it came 2009 and I had that interior voice urging me to talk to my husband about the Latin Mass. I responded to that voice and said"no, it`d be impossible, he will say no"..and that voice contined to talk to me.
Christmas 2009 was coming, and I finally talked to my husband, that was early December, it was the first time he heard about the Latin Mass, I tried to explain to him the best I could! I told him that the only present I wanted for Christmas is to go to Latin Mass, at least for one day! I had hope that we would love and we `ll come back for more. He was a little reluctant because that church is very away from our home, 35 minutes away, but I had to have that chance, of Christmas feeling to ask him that. And he said yes!! I was so happy! We went to Latin for first time on December 13, 2009! I wore my beautiful mantilla and I made a veil for my daughter. We both loved everything about the Latin Mass! Not only the beautiful choir but everything, every ritual, everything is so reverent towards God! We found our Heaven on earth!
On next Sunday we went back to new mass rite, since our daughter was at children choir, at this ultra modern, not-so catholic church. I was so sad to be back to new mass after seen Heaven. I was not the same. My heart and my soul was at Latin Mass. I had that feeling that we missed the true Mass. I had to persist and convince my husband and daughter to be back to Latin Mass...our problem now was my daughter, she liked the new mass better and she loved to be at the choir. So on next Sunday we made a deal, we attended the both Masses on same day, it was very very hard. Soon after the Latin Mass we had to run to new mass just because she had to be at the choir.
But the Divine Providence helped us! We were trying to find a way to leave that parish forever! It was not easy task, since she loved to be at the choir, it was joyful and fun. In 2010 her choir director left the parish and everybody was in shock, and many people left too, so we got this chance for her leave the choir!! We were free now to attend the Latin Mass only! I was so happy!
There are many reasons we converted to Latin Mass, the main reason is the Truth, the real and true Catholicism is there! It is the Mass where the saints have been, where my grandparents and great grand parents have been and kept their faith. We don`t see abuse at Latin Mass, we don`t see liturgical abuse there either, we don`t see altar girls, or clapping of hands at the mass, we don`t see dancing, we don`t see protestant songs, we don`t see lay people giving holy Communion, we don`t see protestant pastor joining the priest at the altar, we don`t have ecumenism there, we don`t see holding of hands, we don`t have communion on hands there, we don`t have immodest clothing there, and so on.
How much different is these two rites. If we study them carefully, their teachings and rituals, different catechisms, they look different religions.The new mass rite looks protestant church, and they promote ecumenism. The ecumenism destroy the Catholic faith, it made the people think all the religions are the same, but it is not true. Oh my God, have mercy on Your Holy Catholic Church and open the eyes and the hearts of all Catholic so they can follow the old rite, the old catechisms, the Latin Mass, so they can become saints like the saints have become! How great and reverent is to receive Holy Communion from the priests only on tongue and on the kneels!
Thanks to God we converted to Latin Mass and old Tradition, by help, grace and will of God! Nobody in my or my husband`s families go to Latin Mass, it is only us, it must be a miracle that we go there.
May God bless you all! Amen!
